On this week's You Couldn't Script It, Edward and Ian peer inside the mind of Sean Bean to watch When Saturday Comes, a paint-by-numbers masturbatory fantasy for every Sheffield United fan with aspirations to make it as a football player. As they pick their way through the carcasses of many tired Northern tropes, they find a world of hard drinking men, helpless gambling addicts, family strife, trouble up t'pit and genuinely appalling Irish accents.
Your heroes also assess Mel Sterland's unlikely role in all of this as well as finding time to weigh in on the Miners Strike of 1984-85, something all soft Southerners are probably best advised not to do. There's also more AI-generated action, as Ian focuses the world's computational powers towards his own ends, only to gallingly produce a film that sounds far better than the one we'd wasted all week watching. Some consolation, at least, for the forthcoming robot uprising.