The Europa League Final: Manchester United vs Tottenham Hotspur - Liveblog!
For the first time in the history of European football, two clubs have arrived for a major final in clown cars. Join me to pick through it and try and make sense of it all.
Eyes down for a full house, because it's time for the European final that makes a mockery of European football! It's 16th versus 17th in the Premier League for a place next season's Champions League! It's Manchester United vs Spurs, live from Bilbao!
If you want a semi-serious preview of the match, I'll gently nudge you in the direction of the one I wrote for Fotmob. I went for 2-2 draw and a penalty shootout that stretches on into tomorrow morning over there, and I was only half-joking.
This match could really end up with just about anything happening, up to and including a sinkhole opening up and swallowing both teams whole, so predicting the result of this one really did feel even more difficult than usual. I'll be back at about 7.45 with a bit more preamble and some team news. See you there, I hope!
7.45: Well good evening, you ‘orrible lot. It’s time for the Europa League Final between Manchester United and Spurs, and yes, I am still sniggering at the absolute audacity of it. I mean, these two have been absolute car crashes in the Premier League season, but somehow they’ve both pulled their fingers out of their fundaments in Europe. Either that or the Premier League is just so much better than every other League in Europe at the moment that they might as well be the Harlem Bleedin’ Globetrotters. Though, to be fair, we didn’t see too much evidence of that in the Champions League this season.
(Actually, it is the truth that the middle-rankings of the Premier League are way stronger than those in other countries because of the Premier League’s television money. I can assure you that the 16th and 17th-placed teams in Belgium have not been turning over the sort of money that Spurs and United have at their disposal. Now that I’m writing a lot about about EFL transfers, I see this a lot - Championship clubs are seen as viable options for clubs in the lower reaches of Ligue Un or the Portuguese Primeira Liga, for example.)
Anyway, how about some teams?
Tottenham Hotspur: Vicario, Porro, Romero, van de Ven, Udogie, Sarr, Bissouma, Bentancur, Johnson, Solanke, Richarlison.
Subs: Austin, Whiteman, Danso, Son, Tel, Gray, Spence, Odobert, Davies, Scarlett, Moore, Ajayi.
Manchester United: Onana, Yoro, Maguire, Shaw, Mazraoui, Casemiro, Fernandes, Dorgu, Diallo, Mount, Hojlund.
Subs: Bayindir, Lindelof, Zirkzee, Eriksen, Garnacho, Dalot, Ugarte, Heaven, Evans, Mainoo, Amass, Collyer.
Richarlison in favour of Son is a bold move, and one that could backfire. Presumably Ange Postecoglou thinks that Richarlison’s muscular hustle and bustle will work better against Manchester United’s milquetoast central defence. Solanke still feels like their most likely outlet for goals tonight. Mason Mount, who still exists, starts for United. They have Zirkzee and Dalot on the bench who were both really touch and go for this one, while Lemy Yoro is back.
But Spurs are already missing James Maddison, Dejan Kulusevski and Lucas Bergvall, and that’s a big hole carved right in the middle of that team. I can’t see past a Manchester United win, in honesty, though. That Massive Club Arrogance can come in mighty handy at times such as this. Manchester United have been a soap opera for more than a decade now, but at least they’ve won some goddam silverware in that time.
Look at them all, inside the stadium. Fools.
7.55: A little background, by the way. I lived in Upper Edmonton until I was five, and the the south-eastern tip of Enfield until I was ten. When I was at junior school, every single kid supported Spurs, while a few of us weirdoes also went to see Enfield. I now live a long way from North London, but that bond remains, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m stuck with them, and they’re stuck with me.
I own one Spurs replica shirt, it’s a navy blue 1986 repro, and it is gorgeous. Oh yeah, and there was this, when I was much younger. Please take a moment to enjoy this photograph:
Anyway, here come the teams, onto a field of what may turn out to be rakes. It’s overcast and rainy in Bilbao. Kick-off in five minutes!
8.02: Okay, so kick-off is not at 8.00. The clock ticks past eight and they’re still distinctly in fannying about moment. They’re changing ends. Do teams bother changing ends often before kick-off these days? It feels like that’s something that I haven’t been paying attention to. We kick off at two minutes past eight. Spurs shooting left to right in all-white. United in red and black.
8.03: Actually, it has just occurred to me that as I’m watching this over the internet, it might be that they kicked off bang on eight and I’m just running behind. It is a legit stream, for the record. Illegal streams were far too much of a pain in the arse for me.
8.05: Sound of Football podcast is licensed to speak to me on this matter:
First Spurs panic of the evening comes when Destiny Udogie attempts a clearance without being entirely certain of what direction he was kicking it. United are starting to dominate possession, and we all know what that Spurs defence is like.
8.10: I have to keep remembering that Darren Fletcher the commentator is not the same Darren Fletcher as Darren Fletcher the former Manchester United player. I know all teams get a bit conspiratorial about broadcasters, but it would be a bit on the nose to have a former Manchester United player commentating on them in the Europa League final against another English team. (Well, against anyone, really.)
8.15: Andre Onana is doing Andre Onana things again, half-coming for a cross which Mazraoui has to head behind with Richarlison lurking just behind him and the goal completely exposed. Did okay punching the resulting corner away, mind.
And then a chance for Spurs! Brennan Johnson gets away down the right and cuts inside and Onana has a fairly easy block to make. The follow-up is then blocked and the ball is finally cleared. Then another chance! Spurs win a free-kick on the left, the ball gets pinged around the edge of the six-yard box, and Richarlison has a shot blocked. Manchester United haven’t applied any pressure since I mentioned that they were starting to apply pressure. That was nine minutes ago.
8.20: So yes, yes indeed, it’s now Manchester United’s turn to attack. Dorgu has to stretch a bit too far and Cristian Romero clears for a corner which Vicario makes an absolute hash of, and a shot across the face of goal flashes just wide. Best chance of the game so far. Both teams look defensively very rickety indeed.
8.25: Bruno Fernandes finds himself in a little space on the United right, but his low cross is comfortably gathered by Vicario. Manchester United have had two-thirds of the possession because they’re winning the midfield, essentially. I told you that losing those three players would really hurt Spurs.
8.30: Amad sells Udogie a dummy but the cross is blocked for a United corner. Predictably, Spurs have a player down injured, and it’s Cistian Romero, who picked up an elebow to the face from Rasmus Hjoland. We’re well into the mid-half lull now. Honestly, when did you last see a team score a goal after 25 minutes? Never happens.
8.40: This has been a pretty lousy half, if I’m honest. They’re just not very good. But tonight they’re also skittish, and nervous, so they’re not taking any chances, and that means that no-one has done anything stupid yet. I do feel as though it’s a-comin’ though. Onana does not seem to have control of his defence, really.
8.43: IT’S AN ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE GOAL AND SPURS LEAD 1-0!
Sarr crosses from the left and Maguire mis-judges, the ball seems to hit Brennan Johnson, and then hits Luke Shaw, and Spurs have the lead!
Honestly, that was a goal befitting of this half. The Manchester United defence defended that like the ball was goddam landmine or something. Every single one of them was at fault, some way or another.
8.46: There will be a mercifully brief two minutes of stoppage-time.
8.48: HALF-TIME - Manchester United 0-1 Tottenham Hotspur
Well, were Spurs were to win the Europa League (FFS), perhaps it would be appropriate if it came as a result of the ball bouncing off Luke Shaw—who I’ve longed to be the springiest player in the Premier League; he really does look like you could use him as bouncy castle—while he standing around like a man waiting for a bus. No-one’s going to pretend this is anything like done, though, especially since United had been nominally the better of the two teams for most of the rest of the half. I’ll be back in 15 minutes. Off to huff some bath salts.
9.05: And we’re under way in the second half!
9.10: Not much to report from the first five minutes of the second half beyond a yellow card for Micky van de Ven for a van de Shove in de back. Careless.
9.15: The commentary team are complaining about the fact that Ruben Amorim hasn’t made any changes yet. Is this a new thing?
Meanwhile:
This was a sensationally bad idea.
9.17: Yellow card for Richarlison, and a free-kick from United on the right. Bruno Fernandes swings it is, and Lemy Yoro is stretching too far to be able to get a full contact on the ball and Spurs scramble it clear.
9.20: I am starting to countenance the possibility of Spurs winning their first major trophy in 17 years and their first European trophy in 41. And frankly, it’s filling me with unease. I literally hadn’t considered it a possibility until just now.
9.25: Nothing has really changed in the second half, so far. These are two nervy teams, who keep on making bad decisions, and who seem determined to wear their skittishness as a badge of pride. The defining characteristic of the first half was the Manchester United defence acting as though they’d only just been introduced to each other.
For most of the first half, Spurs were tame enough to not cause them any significant issues—though they demonstrated it nevertheless—and as soon as they got a decent ball into the penalty area they folded like a house of cards. And the first 19 - as I write these words - minutes of the second half have been just as disjointed as the first.
Substitution for Spurs on 66 minutes. Richarlison is a trier, but was largely ineffectual. Heung-min Son comes on to replace him. I think I understand the logic of that team decision, but let’s face it, it hasn’t worked. Perhaps Son will liven things up.
9.28: Incredible clearance by van de Ven. A cross from the right and Vicario is in absolute nomansland, Hojlund heads goalwards but van de Ven bicycle kicks the ball off the line!
9.30: Starting to feel a bit nervous now, lads.
Substitutions for Manchester United. Zirkzee replaces Hojland and Garnacho replaces Mount, who did again cease to exist for the duration of this match.
9.32: Chance for Manchester United, when another cross from the right - United are definitely getting more joy down that side of the pitch - finds Bruno Fernandes, whose header flies just wide.
9.34: Garnacho has barely been on the pitch for two minutes and he’s had United’s best chance of the evening, a low shot from the corner of the penalty area which Vicario pushes away. United cannot, as ever, do anything with the corner.
9.36: TNT Sport are starting to show shots of anxious-looking Manchester United. First run for the inevitable crying child shot. THERE’S STILL TIME, TOTTENHAM. THERE’S STILL TIME.
9.40: It would appear that there’s been a redetermination of the goal and that it’s been given to Brennan Johnson after all. Not that this makes it any less worthy of being the winning goal in this particular football match. I just think that Manchester United have got that about them, in their DNA. They were a goal down against Bayern Munich in 1999 on 89 minutes and they bloody won that.
9.42: Because I’m not a relentless sourpuss, I should briefly point out that Spurs have been defensively very good this evening. This is also very strange, following the narrow win against Eintracht Frankfurt in the quarter-finals. This is a similar performance to this, defensively, at least. Now, don’t get me wrong, here. They’ve got it in them to chuck one in. But that is how they’ve performed for the first 85 minutes.
9.45: I am now at the point at which I feel as though I can’t say anything because it will prove to be a jinx. Let’s face it, I’ve got form.
9.47: Yellow card for Harry Maguire, for barging into Romero. They’ve been at it all evening.
9.50: Archie Gray is coming on for Pape Sarr, and Djed Spence is coming on for Destiny Udogie. Patrick Dorgu is replaced by Kobbie Mainoo. They come onto the pitch at 89 minutes and 30 seconds. There will be seven minutes of stoppage-time.
9.51: A yellow card for Victor Lindelhof, which is an achievement, since he hasn’t been on the pitch since the pre-match warm-ups.
9.52: Three minutes into stoppage-time, and my heart is beating like a cartoon wolf in a sharp suit upon seeing a sexy lady wolf.
9.55: They’re both being bad again. Spurs keep just giving the ball to Manchester United, who then waste their gift. Two minutes.
9.56: Manchester United have an appeal for a penalty so weak that they don’t even really even appeal it themselves.
BRILLIANT SAVE BY VICARIO!
Shaw’s header!
The seven minutes are up. Manchester United have one corner to force extra-time.
9.58: Garnacho overhead kicks the deep corner into the side-netting!
9.59: SPURS HAVE WON THE EUROPA LEAGUE!
Manchester United 0-1 Tottenham Hotspur!
I’m going to take a moment to collect myself and enjoy this moment, if that’s okay, and I’ll be back after the trophy award with some final thoughts. It’s been a long time.
10.20: Okay, so I want to tackle this in two parts. First of all, the match itself. Well, it was 16th vs 17th in the Premier League. But hang on a minute, that doesn’t really mean anything within the context of this match itself. It matters that this should have been taking place in the first place, but not in terms of the match. There’s no reason it should have been so… bad.
Both teams were careless and, at times, nervy. In that respect, they were at least evenly-matched. But the sloppiness on both sides was very noticeable, in a way in which it often at far lower levels of the game than the final of a goddam European trophy. The first goal was always important precisely because they both had so much resting on it. The panic could set in. The shape could be lost.
And that’s what happened to Manchester United. Their delivery into the Spurs penalty area was broadly atrocious, and their passing was mostly comfortably dealt with easily by a well-drilled Spurs defence. Man of the Match was surely Micky van de Ven, who was superb throughout the evening, never mind that late goal-line clearance.
Spurs did enough, and perhaps that’s what matters. They were defensively solid and they took the chance when it came. The players they did have at their disposal did their bit. And who could not be happy for Heung-min Son, one of the nicest people to be involved in professional football? By the time the trophy is lifted, the Manchester United supporters have left the building. They may be waiting a while for the Spurs supporters to leave.
***
And if I may, this is personal. In some respects, bittersweet. My dad brought me to Spurs. He’ll have watched the match tonight, but I couldn’t say for certain that he’ll be able to remember it in the morning, thanks to dementia. I know other people who have been through horrendous mental health crises support this team, too. I hope that, should you see this, you’re at the very least enjoying this evening.
And on that note, it’s time for me to sign out, crack open a beer, and let it sink in. After 17 years, it’s been a long time coming.
Ange told you, dude. He fucking told you, bro.
Congratulations !
Various Celtic leaning group chats in Glasgow are enjoying this. Quite a few candles are still held for Big Ange here.